Work out the date first. The booking and the lessons both hang on it. A boy becomes Bar Mitzvah on his 13th Hebrew birthday, and he usually reads on the Shabbat on or after it. That date shifts against the English calendar every year.
Work it out in this order
First, find his Hebrew birth date. If he was born after nightfall, use the next Hebrew date. Second, take the same day and month in the Hebrew year 13 years later. That is his 13th Hebrew birthday, and the day he becomes Bar Mitzvah. Third, if you want the Torah reading, find the Shabbat on or after that day. You can check any date with the Bar Mitzvah calculator or the Hebcal date converter.
Two worked examples
A boy born on Friday 10 January 2014 was born on 9 Shevat 5774. He becomes Bar Mitzvah on 9 Shevat 5787, which is Sunday 17 January 2027, not on 10 January.
A boy born on Thursday 12 June 2014 was born on 14 Sivan 5774. He becomes Bar Mitzvah on 14 Sivan 5787, which is Saturday 19 June 2027. That is a Shabbat, so his reading is the same day.
In both examples the date is a week later than the English birthday. In other years it can be earlier or later, by up to about a month.
Why the date moves
The Hebrew calendar follows the moon, and it adds a leap month in 7 years out of every 19 to keep the years in line with the sun. The Hebrew year is therefore not the same length as the English year. Last year’s date will mislead you.
What to book first
Count back from the date. We recommend 8 to 12 months of weekly lessons, so a boy whose date is 10 months away should start now. Every month you wait is a month of practice he does not get. For the portion he reads, see what is my Bar Mitzvah parsha. For the lessons themselves, see online Bar Mitzvah lessons.
Questions parents ask
Is his Bar Mitzvah on the same English date every year? Usually not. Months follow the moon, and a leap month keeps the years in line with the sun, so the Hebrew date moves against the English calendar. It lands in a window of about a month, and the pattern repeats every 19 years.
Is the party on the same day as the Bar Mitzvah? He becomes Bar Mitzvah on the day itself. Many families hold the Torah reading on the nearest Shabbat, or a later one that suits the family, and the celebration on a convenient day. Your own Rabbi can tell you what your community does.
What if he was born after dark? The Hebrew day begins at nightfall, so a birth after dark counts as the next Hebrew date. See Hebrew birthday and Bar Mitzvah date.
How early should we start? We recommend 8 to 12 months of weekly lessons before the date.
Book the assessment once you have the date
Bring the date to a 30-minute Zoom assessment with Rabbi M. Sabbah. He will hear your son read and tell you whether the time you have is enough, and what to do first if it is tight. Continue with lessons and the assessment is credited in full toward the first month.
